Posts tagged lesbian

Hello, LGBT Youth! Now Take a Stance and Pay It Forward!
Kids today don’t know how good they have it. I came out at 30. While my friends had no problems with my newfound gayness, to this day my family still won’t talk about it. In contrast, our newest college intern at OneGoodLove came out publicly at 15. His friends embraced him, his extended family gave him a standing ovation, and his mother decided to write a book about it. The world has changed.
In light of the recent Supreme Court rulings in favor of marriage equality, there is no doubt that things have gotten better. The federal government is finally recognizing and fighting for LGBT equality, mainstream media have been flooded with positive images of LGBT role models, and support networks like the Trevor Project and PFLAG are more vibrant than ever. It is therefore not surprising that the average age for LGBT youth to come out has dropped from 23 to 16 in recent years.
While all of these gains have helped change the tide, I believe that technology has amplified these societal shifts to allow LGBT youth to come out at earlier ages. With the youth generation perpetually entrenched in their laptops, cellphones, and iPads, young LGBT people have constant access to the aforementioned role models and support systems, which tell LGBT youth that their emotions and attractions are not aberrant but normal and regular, perhaps even extraordinary. And technology has allowed these messages and support networks to spread this hope to a larger subset of the population than ever before.
So a questioning kid in Columbus, Ohio, can now quietly call the Trevor Hotline from his bedroom while watching an “It Gets Better” video on YouTube and streaming an episode ofModern Family. When he’s ready, he can post a status on Facebook declaring himself a “newfound gayby.” And when 300 of his friends from all over the world like his status and leave him messages of congratulations, he may finally have the courage to kick down the closet door, walk downstairs, and come out to his parents.
Thus, though they’re still far from perfect, things have gotten better, and much of the LGBT youth culture is benefiting from these recent social gains. However, we cannot let that be enough. It is ironic that the increased support and connectivity that has resulted from the technology boom has also led many young people to become disconnected and despondent. We cannot let this happen if we want to continue to grow as individuals and a community.
So I urge the youth culture to take a stand. To the LGBT youth who have come out early, benefiting from the social gains that your older counterparts fought for: Don’t let that be good enough for you. Get out there and give back or fight on. It is important to note that “it gets better” implies a perpetual progression. Though life may be good as it is, it will continue to get better. So further the social benefits and gains for your generation and the ones to come, and remember that progress dies when the current generation says, “That’s good enough for us.”


 

Hello, LGBT Youth! Now Take a Stance and Pay It Forward!

Kids today don’t know how good they have it. I came out at 30. While my friends had no problems with my newfound gayness, to this day my family still won’t talk about it. In contrast, our newest college intern at OneGoodLove came out publicly at 15. His friends embraced him, his extended family gave him a standing ovation, and his mother decided to write a book about it. The world has changed.

In light of the recent Supreme Court rulings in favor of marriage equality, there is no doubt that things have gotten better. The federal government is finally recognizing and fighting for LGBT equality, mainstream media have been flooded with positive images of LGBT role models, and support networks like the Trevor Project and PFLAG are more vibrant than ever. It is therefore not surprising that the average age for LGBT youth to come out has dropped from 23 to 16 in recent years.

While all of these gains have helped change the tide, I believe that technology has amplified these societal shifts to allow LGBT youth to come out at earlier ages. With the youth generation perpetually entrenched in their laptops, cellphones, and iPads, young LGBT people have constant access to the aforementioned role models and support systems, which tell LGBT youth that their emotions and attractions are not aberrant but normal and regular, perhaps even extraordinary. And technology has allowed these messages and support networks to spread this hope to a larger subset of the population than ever before.

So a questioning kid in Columbus, Ohio, can now quietly call the Trevor Hotline from his bedroom while watching an “It Gets Better” video on YouTube and streaming an episode ofModern Family. When he’s ready, he can post a status on Facebook declaring himself a “newfound gayby.” And when 300 of his friends from all over the world like his status and leave him messages of congratulations, he may finally have the courage to kick down the closet door, walk downstairs, and come out to his parents.

Thus, though they’re still far from perfect, things have gotten better, and much of the LGBT youth culture is benefiting from these recent social gains. However, we cannot let that be enough. It is ironic that the increased support and connectivity that has resulted from the technology boom has also led many young people to become disconnected and despondent. We cannot let this happen if we want to continue to grow as individuals and a community.

So I urge the youth culture to take a stand. To the LGBT youth who have come out early, benefiting from the social gains that your older counterparts fought for: Don’t let that be good enough for you. Get out there and give back or fight on. It is important to note that “it gets better” implies a perpetual progression. Though life may be good as it is, it will continue to get better. So further the social benefits and gains for your generation and the ones to come, and remember that progress dies when the current generation says, “That’s good enough for us.”

 

New Dating Site Caters To LGBTs Looking For Soul Mates Not Hookups

Head east down Santa Monica, and as you drive through West Hollywood, you will see the gayest billboard ever. Standing proud above Palm Car Wash is a gigantic photo of two men kissing and the words, “First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage.” It’s part of the ad campaign for OneGoodLove, the only dating website for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender singles seeking marriage or long-term relationships, which launches at a rather opportune time.

Since the landmark defeats of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and Proposition 8, the LGBT community has taken to their new marriage rights like no ones’ business. A recent survey of LGBT individuals indicates that 76 percent of all gay and lesbian singles now see marriage in their future, with 58 percent identifying marriage as their ultimate dating goal. In fact, the LGBT community has surged ahead their straight counterparts, with only 61 percent of straight singles harboring any sort of intent of getting married.

Furthermore, the marriage equality rulings have affected more than just the LGBT community. While 41 percent of gay and lesbian respondents report that their families already see same-sex relationships as a positive thing, more than a third stated that the recent cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their personal same-sex relationships in a more positive light.

Thus, with marriage on the mind, OneGoodLove’s billboard not only fits in perfectly with the relationship goals emerging in the LGBT community, but also presents the gayest version of love—not “gay” in the pejorative sense, but gay as in the traditional sense—gay as in happy, gay as in joyful, and gay as in fully accepting. It suggests that in this new era of marriage equality, love is the defining factor in marriage, and with it, any couple is free to say, “I do.”


Full story here: http://www.queerty.com/new-dating-site-caters-to-lgbts-looking-for-soul-mates-not-hookups-20130730/#ixzz2b8ObYzZL

Source: queerty.com

Frank Mastronuzzi and OneGoodLove.com win the 2013 NGLCC Pitch Competition. — at National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce-NGLCC.
OneGoodLove.com Reports 63 Percent of Gay and Lesbian Singles Are More Likely To Consider Marriage As Their Dating Goal After DOMA Ruling Site’s “Marriage Equality State of the Date Report” Looks at Same-Sex Love and Marriage in the Wake of Supreme Court Rulings
Los Angeles, CA—July 25, 2013—In light of the recent Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) ruling, OneGoodLove (http://www.onegoodlove.com), the Internet’s leading relationship-focused online dating service for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) singles, announced today the release of its “Marriage Equality State of the Date Report.” Findings of the report, based on a survey of 875 LGBT singles, suggest that while the Supreme Court ruling on DOMA and California’s Proposition 8 aren’t putting social pressure on gay and lesbian people to immediately “tie the knot,” many gay and lesbian singles are now more likely to consider marriage their ultimate relationship goal because of the court’s recent landmark decisions.  Improved Outlook on Marriage Since the DOMA Ruling
Sixty-three percent of LGBT singles surveyed said they were more likely to think of marriage as their ultimate dating goal now that the Supreme Court has struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), with only 35 percent saying that their outlooks have not changed.   When asked whether or not the recent cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their same-sex relationships in a more positive light, 37 percent of the LGBT participants said yes, 22 percent said no, and 41 percent said that their parents already see their relationships as a positive thing. Thirty-eight percent of the transgender respondents said that the cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their relationships in a more positive light, but only 13 percent said that their parents already see their relationships as a positive thing. Eighty-seven percent of all LGBT singles reported that increases in same-sex marriage rights would not increase the societal pressure on them to settle down and tie the knot.
LGBT Marriage Material
Forty-four percent of gay and lesbian singles reported that honesty was the most important quality for a future husband or wife to have. Thirteen percent of lesbian women reported intelligence as the most important quality in a future wife, and 15 percent of gay men said a sense of humor was the most important quality in a husband. Thirty-seven percent of all participants said that communication was the most important personal quality they would have to improve to make a future marriage work. Twenty percent said they would have to get their lives in better financial order to marry and live happily ever after.  Seventy-six percent of all gay and lesbian singles surveyed said they see marriage in their future. Only 66 percent of bisexual and 50 percent of transgender singles see marriage in their future.
LGBT Wedding Bells Ringing
Forty-two percent of all LGBT participants said they wanted a small wedding gathering of just friends and family, and 24 percent said they wanted a low-key ceremony and reception. Only six percent of gay men wanted an “over the top party with everyone they had ever known,” while 18 percent of bisexual and 14 percent of lesbian singles wanted the same. None of the transgender respondents wanted an over the top wedding.
 “This survey points to the tangible, romantic hopefulness in the gay and lesbian community right now,” said Frank Mastronuzzi, Co-founder and Chief Love Officer at OneGoodLove.com. “  Commemorating that hopefulness, on July 17, OneGoodLove.com launched a billboard in West Hollywood, California, reflecting the shifting dating and relationship goals emerging in the LGBT community.  The billboard features two men kissing, with copy that reads:  First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage
For survey details, and to see the billboard, visit the OneGoodLove blog at:  blog.onegoodlove.comContact Frank Mastronuzzi at:  Frank AT onegoodlove.com   About OneGoodLove.com: OneGoodLove.com is the first online dating site built specifically for relationship-minded gay and lesbian singles. Co-founded by Frank Mastronuzzi, former senior manager of business development at Match.com, and Nic Marlin, Internet entrepreneur and marketing executive, the site’s mission is to offer gay and lesbian singles a better way to meet life mates, while also directly challenging the stereotype that gay and lesbian dating is primarily promiscuous. The site’s proprietary Personality Profile Test and matching algorithm was formulated specifically for gay and lesbian singles, based on analysis of long-term lesbian and gay relationships. oneGoodLove.com is committed to giving back to the LGBT community through corporate volunteerism and donations to LGBT non-profits.
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OneGoodLove.com Reports 63 Percent of Gay and Lesbian Singles Are More Likely To Consider Marriage As Their Dating Goal After DOMA Ruling
 
Site’s “Marriage Equality State of the Date Report” Looks at Same-Sex Love and Marriage in the Wake of Supreme Court Rulings

Los Angeles, CA—July 25, 2013—In light of the recent Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) ruling, OneGoodLove (http://www.onegoodlove.com), the Internet’s leading relationship-focused online dating service for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) singles, announced today the release of its “Marriage Equality State of the Date Report.” Findings of the report, based on a survey of 875 LGBT singles, suggest that while the Supreme Court ruling on DOMA and California’s Proposition 8 aren’t putting social pressure on gay and lesbian people to immediately “tie the knot,” many gay and lesbian singles are now more likely to consider marriage their ultimate relationship goal because of the court’s recent landmark decisions.
  
Improved Outlook on Marriage Since the DOMA Ruling

Sixty-three percent of LGBT singles surveyed said they were more likely to think of marriage as their ultimate dating goal now that the Supreme Court has struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), with only 35 percent saying that their outlooks have not changed.  
 
When asked whether or not the recent cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their same-sex relationships in a more positive light, 37 percent of the LGBT participants said yes, 22 percent said no, and 41 percent said that their parents already see their relationships as a positive thing.
 
Thirty-eight percent of the transgender respondents said that the cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their relationships in a more positive light, but only 13 percent said that their parents already see their relationships as a positive thing.
 
Eighty-seven percent of all LGBT singles reported that increases in same-sex marriage rights would not increase the societal pressure on them to settle down and tie the knot.

LGBT Marriage Material

Forty-four percent of gay and lesbian singles reported that honesty was the most important quality for a future husband or wife to have. Thirteen percent of lesbian women reported intelligence as the most important quality in a future wife, and 15 percent of gay men said a sense of humor was the most important quality in a husband.
 
Thirty-seven percent of all participants said that communication was the most important personal quality they would have to improve to make a future marriage work. Twenty percent said they would have to get their lives in better financial order to marry and live happily ever after. 
 
Seventy-six percent of all gay and lesbian singles surveyed said they see marriage in their future. Only 66 percent of bisexual and 50 percent of transgender singles see marriage in their future.

LGBT Wedding Bells Ringing

Forty-two percent of all LGBT participants said they wanted a small wedding gathering of just friends and family, and 24 percent said they wanted a low-key ceremony and reception.
 
Only six percent of gay men wanted an “over the top party with everyone they had ever known,” while 18 percent of bisexual and 14 percent of lesbian singles wanted the same. None of the transgender respondents wanted an over the top wedding.

 “This survey points to the tangible, romantic hopefulness in the gay and lesbian community right now,” said Frank Mastronuzzi, Co-founder and Chief Love Officer at OneGoodLove.com. “  Commemorating that hopefulness, on July 17, OneGoodLove.com launched a billboard in West Hollywood, California, reflecting the shifting dating and relationship goals emerging in the LGBT community.  The billboard features two men kissing, with copy that reads:  First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage


For survey details, and to see the billboard, visit the OneGoodLove blog at:  
blog.onegoodlove.com
Contact Frank Mastronuzzi at:  Frank AT 
onegoodlove.com
 
  
About 
OneGoodLove.com
OneGoodLove.com is the first online dating site built specifically for relationship-minded gay and lesbian singles. Co-founded by Frank Mastronuzzi, former senior manager of business development at Match.com, and Nic Marlin, Internet entrepreneur and marketing executive, the site’s mission is to offer gay and lesbian singles a better way to meet life mates, while also directly challenging the stereotype that gay and lesbian dating is primarily promiscuous. The site’s proprietary Personality Profile Test and matching algorithm was formulated specifically for gay and lesbian singles, based on analysis of long-term lesbian and gay relationships. oneGoodLove.com is committed to giving back to the LGBT community through corporate volunteerism and donations to LGBT non-profits.

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Fuel the fight to win marriage nationwide with this innovative new Indiegogo campaign!

Four awesome LGBT-owned and operated companies are sponsoring a crowd-funding campaign to raise money for Freedom to Marry, the campaign to win marriage for same-sex couples nationwide. This month, we’re coming off of two huge wins at the Supreme Court - wins that have allowed great couples like Amanda and Jen (right) to marry in their home state of California and have that marriage federally respected.

Four companies - Wolfe Video, the largest exclusive distributor of LGBT films globally; Lesbian.com, an online hub dedicated to empowering the global lesbian community; oneGoodLove.com, the first online dating site specifically for gay and lesbian singles; and Sweet, an eco-friendly lesbian travel site - are donating “Thank You” gifts and experiences to contributors to this IndieGogo campaign. 

GIVE TO THE CAMPAIGN HERE.

The organizations have committed some awesome rewards and “perks” for donating through IndieGogo.com. They include free streaming and download-to-wn movies from Wolfe Video, premium and VIP memberships to oneGoodLove.com, gift certificates toward premium resort vacations, and banner advertising on Lesbian.com. Don’t miss the full list of rewards available HERE.   

Kathy Wolfe, CEO of Wolfe Video, spoke about the crowd-funding campaign in a video on the site (below). She said:

While to outward appearances, these four companies are very different, what we share is the core belief that social responsibility extends to commerce - that corporations and individuals should share in the same responsibility. In that spirit, we want to do our part in the effort to extend legal marriage to each and every same-sex couple who desires it. 

Freedom to Marry founder and President also appears in the video. He spoke with Kathy about the importance of the campaign, saying:

We have the momentum, we have the truth, we have the support of the American people, and we have the winning strategy. We just need to keep at it, and with your help through this new and innovative partnership we can build the resources we need to win.

The Indie Gogo campaign runs until August 5, 2013. DONATE TODAY. 

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What an incredible interview from ABC San Francisco with Trish McDermott, OneGoodLove Advisor.  She was so touched by the Supreme Court Ruling that it brought her to tears.

And her oldest of four children, Ryan, was incredibly articulate and warm. What an incredible young man! 

Much love to Trish, Julie, Ryan and the rest of the McDermott household! 

Overcoming Negative Thinking

If you’ve been dating for a while with no success, you may feel down about the whole process. You may even start to think, “Why should I bother?” 

It’s a bad cycle, and a common one, but it can be avoided. The key is to change your way of thinking. Do any of the following negative thought patterns sound familiar to you?

1) The “Nobody’s As Good As My Ex-Boyfriend” Blues

Read More

Source: onegoodlove.com

Can You Date Someone Who Is Significantly Older or Younger Than You?

People put a lot of limits on themselves when it comes to dating. They may want someone who looks a certain way, who makes a certain amount of money, or who likes certain hobbies. Age is one of the biggest reasons people have for rejecting someone. There are people who only like to date people their age and won’t budge no matter what.

I confess to having a preference in this department as well. I will not date women who are more than six years younger than me or women who are more than ten years older. Years of dating experience tell me this is the right age group for me. However, I also try to be flexible. Dating is hard and if your preferences are carved in stone, you could miss out on a lot of great people. Therefore, if someone seems really fantastic I will usually waive my strict age requirements. (Though as a 36 year old, I’d never date someone less than 25 or over 50. That, I can’t see ever working, no matter how charming she may be.)

Here are my thoughts on what to consider if you decide to date significantly above or below your age:

I think the biggest challenge with dating young people is that they are not always so mature, and also they are in a different place in their life. If you are 45, can you really relate to a grad student? Do you really want to go out with them every weekend, clubbing and dancing? Will you really have a meeting of the minds? These are all things to think about and mull over carefully. I think it is particularly a bad idea to date a young person who has just come out, when you are an older person. The younger person is really not sure of herself or her sexuality at this stage, and you will wind up playing “teacher.” I think this kind of relationship only works if the younger person is extremely mature, or if the older person is slightly immature. Some of us may be 45, but act 25, and vice versa. But if the maturity levels are too different, this won’t be a relationship that succeeds in the long term.

If you are dating an older person it may work—but only if you are in your late twenties and beyond. Anything younger than that I think is just asking for trouble. As a young person in your late twenties or early thirties, you may not relate to others in your age category, and you may do better with someone older.

Whichever direction you go in, one thing you can’t worry about is what other people think. Friends, family or strangers may see fit to comment on your relationship—or even make fun of it. In the end, that doesn’t matter. All that matters ultimately is what you think of each other.

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