Sometimes, no matter how hard we try to present ourselves in a positive light, we end up turning off potential mates. You only have one chance to make a good first impression, so here are a few things to avoid doing the next time you are out on a date.
1. Being too needy.
I think one of the worst things you can do on a date is to ask during the middle of it: “How do you think things are going so far?” It puts a lot of pressure on your date, and makes you look needy, like you need instant confirmation of how the date is going, because you are so insecure about yourself.
We may act needy on a date because there’s a lot of pressure on the date to be a success. Maybe you haven’t had a relationship in a few years and you really want this date to work out. What you need to do is put that pressure aside for a while. Don’t worry how the date is going, just have fun while it is happening, be relaxed, put your best face forward, and let the chips fall where they may. You can’t force love to happen, and trying to do so will only make you look like a weirdo.
2. Talking too much.
A good conversation is all about give and take. Listen to what your date is saying so you can respond correctly and create stimulating conversation. If you don’t listen to what he is saying and just spout stuff you want to spout the whole darn time, he’s going to notice and think you are a bore.
3. Not maintaining eye contact.
One of the most important things you can do during a date is to maintain eye contact. You may feel uncomfortable doing so if you are shy or self-conscious, but you need to get over that. Eye contact is a way of establishing trust. If you avoid looking at a person he will wonder what you are hiding. He might also wonder if you are even really interested in him. This is not the way you want to start off a date. On the same note, though, you don’t want to stare at someone in an obnoxious way. That will make them feel self-conscious and have them feeling defensive.
Most people want to be with someone who has a sense of humor. If you never laugh during a date, he is going to think you are too stuffy—especially if you are at a comedy club or a funny movie. And if he tells jokes, you should try to laugh or at least smile at some of them, even if you don’t think they’re rip-roaringly funny. It’s just the polite thing to do.
5. Not saying “I had a nice time.”
At the end of a date, you should say you had a good time, even if there were some problems. Always leave the date on a good note because you never know whether this is someone you may want to see in the future.